https://github.com/fabforms/pooptastic
form backend
https://github.com/fabforms/pooptastic
Last synced: 28 days ago
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form backend
- Host: GitHub
- URL: https://github.com/fabforms/pooptastic
- Owner: fabforms
- Created: 2025-05-16T09:07:56.000Z (11 months ago)
- Default Branch: main
- Last Pushed: 2025-05-16T09:34:53.000Z (11 months ago)
- Last Synced: 2025-05-30T01:39:12.189Z (10 months ago)
- Language: JavaScript
- Homepage: https://fabform.io
- Size: 5.86 KB
- Stars: 0
- Watchers: 1
- Forks: 0
- Open Issues: 0
-
Metadata Files:
- Readme: README.md
Awesome Lists containing this project
README
# 💩 **Pooptastic™** 💩
### *“The number one package for your number two problems.”*
> “npm install pooptastic and suddenly my life had purpose. And skidmarks.”
> — **Sir Dumpsalot, CTO of BrownCloud Inc.**
---
## 🧻 What in the actual flush is this?
**Pooptastic™** is the most majestic, absurd, and pointlessly brilliant JavaScript package to ever grace the bowl of software development.
It does:
* Nothing productive âś…
* Everything childish âś…
* Unmatched commitment to crap âś…âś…âś…
Use it in your production app. Or don’t.
**Use it in your bathroom. Definitely.**
---
## đźš˝ Installation
```bash
npm install pooptastic
```
It installs faster than bad sushi goes through your intestines.
---
## 💩 Features So Good They’re Criminally Constipated
| Feature | Description |
| -------------------- | ---------------------------------------------------------------------- |
| `isPoop()` | Returns true if input is poop. False if you're lying to yourself. |
| `flushPoop()` | Removes all evidence. Emotionally satisfying. May cause splashback. |
| `ratePoop()` | Poop reviews by our AI turd critic. Michelin Star not included. |
| `generatePoopName()` | Instantly rebrands you as “Baron Von Buttcheeks” or “Sir Plops-a-Lot.” |
| `getPoopFortune()` | Like a fortune cookie, but stinkier and far more honest. |
| `poopChain()` | A blockchain made entirely of đź’©. Completely unverified. |
| `dumpHeap()` | Deletes your hopes and dreams. And some code. |
| `lintWipe()` | Lints code with moist towelette precision. |
| `autoGrunt()` | Adds ambient grunting for full immersion. |
| `fiberBoost()` | Makes loops more regular. And poopier. |
---
## 🧪 Sample Dump
```js
const poop = require('pooptastic');
console.log(poop.isPoop('đź’©'));
// true
console.log(poop.ratePoop());
// "9/10 — started with flair, ended with a fart."
console.log(poop.getPoopFortune());
// "You will soon face a deeply emotional flush."
poop.flushPoop();
// đź’¨ SWOOOOOSH đź’¦
```
---
## 🎠Alternative Use Cases
* Use as a dependency to confuse your boss
* Install on a coworker’s project during lunch
* Build an app called **CRUD** that’s literal
* Replace your linter with `lintWipe()` and watch the chaos
---
## 🪠Poop Puns & Non-Toilet Nonsense
* Our code is **cleaner than a bidet on turbo mode**
* Uses zero toilet paper: we're an **eco-shart package**
* Runs like a dream. **A wet one.**
* Smells like **teen spirit and refried regret**
* Now with less kernel panic, more **cornel panic**
**Bonus command:**
```js
poop.wisdomDrop();
// "Even a polished turd is still full of shit."
```
---
## 🦄 Non-Toilet Randomness for Maximum WTF
* `poop.summonBathroomWizard()` – Grants you +3 flush speed.
* `poop.unlockForbiddenStall()` – The one with the good lighting.
* `poop.invokeToiletGod()` – "You rang?"
* `poop.teleportToGasStationRestroom()` – Not recommended.
* `poop.generatePoopNFT()` – Not stored on the blockchain, stored in your shame.
---
## đź‘‘ Poop Royalty Name Generator
Let us rename you to:
* Count Clench
* Doody Gaga
* Sploosh Daddy
* Lady GooGoo
* Rear Admiral Splash
* Peeoncé
* Sir Tinkleton von Flatulence
---
## đź”® Fortune Turds
```js
poop.getPoopFortune();
// “He who flushes twice doth doubt his deeds.”
//
// “Beware the fart that asks no questions.”
//
// “Your next meal shall be your undoing.”
```
---
## 🧼 Sanity Disclaimer
This package:
* Will not fix your bugs
* Will not improve performance
* Might make your teammates lose respect for you
* **But your inner 8-year-old will cheer**
---
## 🧻 Made by the Creators of FabForm.io
This idiotic masterpiece is brought to you by the same folks who built
**[FabForm.io](https://fabform.io)** – a real service for collecting real form submissions… not poop.
> 💡 FabForm.io — Because not everything should end up in the toilet.
---
## ⚖️ License
Licensed under the **BMIT** (Bathroom MIT) License.
> *"Go forth and flush freely."*
---
* `đź’© Poop Rating: 10/10`
* `🪠Flush Tested`
* `🧻 No Wipes Left Behind`
Let’s squeeze every drop of ridiculous glory out of this.